I hate to admit that I’m kinda getting used to this whole no dog thing. He has officially been pugnapped and I am starting to be sorta ok with it. I don’t have to go home immediately after work and walk him and I don’t have to walk him at 2 am when I get home from the bar on Friday night. This timeshare thing I’ve arranged really fits nicely into my life. Does this make me the most horrible dog owner ever or is it a win win? I feel guilty for not dying to have him around everyday, since Maximus really is the love of my life. I feel like the husband that is having a midlife crisis and just needs a European vacation with the guys. He gets to be a practice dog every other weekend (albeit a very long weekend) for a couple with 2 little kids, and mommy gets a break from the responsibility. The thunderstorms last night made me think about how I definitely would prefer to die WITH Maximus should there be a tornado.

This is a random aside, but I want J-Si to stop wearing the cologne he has on. Not because I don’t like the smell, but because scent is the closest thing to memory and to me it’s the smell of heartbreak. You know the emotions that get conjured up when you smell something? Fresh cut grass in the summer reminds me of soccer practices. Chance by Chanel reminds me of my best girlfriend Becca. Freshly tarred pavement makes me think of my summer walks to the local pool. I loved that smell of pavement…kinda weird? Anyways, perfumes and colognes really have an effect on me. I can smell people sometimes. When I’m in a bar and smell a certain cologne it’s like I know the person is there because I register that smell. I don’t know what the name of the cologne is, I know what the bottle looks like. Anyways, J-Si claims he’s been wearing it for 12 years. I don’t know how that’s possible considering I have only smelled it on him a handful of times and I always tell him, “grrr, stop wearing the scent of heartbreak.” He thinks it doesn’t matter because he has worn it forever. Do guys not have this same sense of smell? I already went through a period of time where breathing alone was difficult because I was so sad. Now I have to breathe in the scent of heartache. I know it’s a bottle of a guy’s torso, but since I don’t know the name I’m going to refer to it as, eau de “heart-ripped out, stomped on, don’t want to get out of bed, why?, leave me alone forever. J-Si is a betting man and a prideful one. This works in my favor. How can I bribe him to stop wearing it?